How Chocolate Pie & Apple Pie Got Together
by SinsForSure
Summary: Written for help haiti over at LJ: Dean/Castiel - Post Apocalypse: Sam tries to help Castiel in "courting" Dean. If only it was easy as pie.


Written for help_haiti over at livejournal.

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How Chocolate Pie & Apple Pie Got Together

---

Sam was pretty sure his jaw was on the floor right now.

Castiel was looking at him, his eyes wide and blue as ever. Even after everything they have gone through, Castiel can still look at a person with utmost innocence. He still managed to look almost alien amongst the Winchesters and Bobby, even after almost a month of being completely human. And he spent almost a year falling before that. Sam shook his head again and leaned his elbows on his knee.

"Wait, you want me to help you _what_? Dean? Seriously?" He knew he sounded incredulous, almost stuttering out in shock. Castiel sighed and looked at him straight. "I want you to help me court Dean."

Court Dean. Castiel wanted Sam's help to court Dean. Sam blinked and played the request in his head over and over again. When it finally clicked, Sam couldn't help but snort in laughter. Castiel's passive, wide-eyed expression twisted into something that can only be described as annoyance. Sam put a hand up, shaking his head.

"OK, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to laugh. Really. But come _on_ Cas. This is _Dean_ we're talking about. 'Courting' isn't the word I'd use when it comes to him," he said, complete with air quotes. Castiel frowned.

"Why are you moving your hands like that? And what should I call it, if not that?" He tilted his head in such a way that was almost adorable. When Castiel first graced them with his presence, Sam was never there to see this action. Dean always said that it was annoying. Sam swore he was blushing when he whined about how the angel looked "stupid" and "was all up in my personal space." But Sam never had a problem with Castiel invading his bubble. Now, he knows why.

"I don't know Cas. Dean's not someone you court. He's more of the…getting drunk on shots then having crazy monkey sex later in a skeezy motel room only to not remember it the morning after kind of guy," he said, his voice amused with a grin plastered on his face. Castiel's face coloured significantly and he looked down.

"I do not wish to have such a crude relationship with Dean," Castiel said, his voice soft and serious. His eyes were cast down, and Sam's grin melted into a sad smile. He nodded and laid a hand on Castiel's shoulder. Blue eyes looked up and Sam grinned at him, "Dean likes you too Cas, you don't need to court him. Trust me on this."

Castiel stared at him for a bit, before shaking his head. Sam sighed and threw his hands up, "Fine, I'll help you. I still say you should just go and tell him how you feel. Dean's not much for this, but hell. I've faced worse." When Castiel looked up not looking utterly pathetic anymore, Sam knew he said the right thing. He clapped his hands together and grabbed his jacket.

"Come on, let's go," he commanded, motioning Castiel off the couch, and grabbing his coat for him. Castiel frowned and looked Sam, putting on his trench coat. "Where are we going?"

Sam grinned, pushing the door so hard that the screen bounced off the wood loudly, "You'll see. Now, let's go!"

---

Dean smirked, admiring his handy work. It was a personal project of his that he took up after they averted the apocalypse. Well, one of his projects. He sighed, wiping the sweat off his brow. Just a year ago, he would not have thought that they would ever avert the apocalypse, but after both he and Sam had said yes to their respective possessors three months ago and came out unharmed, Dean was a new believer of the impossible. Much more than he was.

It was what Bobby liked to call a miracle. Dean remembered exactly the hour of when they both said yes. Everything was going down hill, people were dying and they were just surrounded by fire. Dean saw Sam pinned down by demons, bleeding from his mouth, his eyes and his nose on the ground in front of him. Dean was on the wall, crucified with his arms spread, his wrists staked through, pinned to the wall and with a sword shoved in his side. Dean couldn't breathe and he watched as Sam screamed when the demons gutted him; demons that realized Lucifer's plan to exterminate them when he's done. He closed his eyes and gasped out for anyone and anything to save his brother. That'd he'd do anything to keep Sam alive. And then, it was just darkness.

When he came to, Bobby was holding him, tapping his face and crying when he groaned in response. Dean's first word was his brother's name, and when he turned his head weakly to find Castiel standing over his brother's sleeping form with a small smile on his face, he knew everything was alright.

He later on learned from Castiel that he had said yes to Michael as his final breathe, and Sam had screamed it to the heavens that he'd let Lucifer have him when he saw Zachariah descending down Dean's crucified form, if Lucifer would save Dean. Both Michael and Lucifer descended into the vessels and everything around them perished in the crossfire. The demons, the angels, everything. It was an explosion of everything bright, beautiful and frightening. Michael stood as Dean and Lucifer stood as Sam. They faced each other in utter silence, basking in the brightness of their respective glories. It was only when Castiel had descended with their father that the light broke, and the world stayed the same with nothing but a whisper.

No one knows why the world didn't end except Castiel. And no one asked.

And even if Dean really wanted to know, he didn't know where to start. He tried but he couldn't form the words. And when Castiel showed up at Bobby's doorstep, barefoot, bleeding and sunburned, Dean found himself not caring anymore. He was just glad that he was alive. That his brother was alive. That Castiel was alive.

Ever since the world did not end, Sam and Dean have been living in Bobby's place with Castiel, helping each other. Their biggest task was to help Castiel adapt to being human, and they were getting there. At first they thought about leaving and getting their own place, but stopped all efforts when Bobby threatened to slash the Impala's tires if they decided to leave him.

Dean blinked out of his reverie when the front door opened and Sam came busting out wearing his coat, followed by Castiel.

"Sam, where are we going?" Castiel asked, looking quite annoyed. Dean grinned at the sight. He watched as Sam sighed and looked at Castiel in what he likes to call his little brother's bitch face. "You're impatient, did anyone tell you that before? We're getting pie Cas, now move your ass!"

Castiel followed Sam and together they exited Bobby's property completely. It was obvious that they didn't notice Dean at all. Dean threw down the rag and frowned, "They're getting pie without me…what the hell?"

Dean growled at no one and shook his head, before following them out.

---

Castiel stared at Sam, before looking down at the three different plates in front of him. "Alright," Sam started, coughing slightly. He pointed at the first plate, "This right here Cas, is apple pie. Dean loves his apple pie, and it's always the safe bet when he tells you to get him some pie." Castiel stared at the pie, which had a crusted and crumbling brown sugar top, oozing with caramel and maple. Then he nodded, which allowed Sam to continue.

"This here," Sam pointed out, "Is cherry pie. I like cherry pie best. Now, getting this is kind of iffy. He's picky about it. Says that some diners make it better than others. He really liked the one from this diner over at Cicero Pines. But it may just have something…ah never mind. Moving on!" Castiel blinked, before nodding. Sam grinned, imagining him with black-rimmed glasses and a small notepad taking notes. He pointed at the last one.

"This one's chocolate pie. He liked it as a kid and he really, really likes it when he's feeling sick or down. Not that he'd ever say it. Get this for him when he's being a little bitch, or something," Sam looked up and guffawed loudly at Castiel's face. The man was looking at him disapprovingly, obviously not in favour of Sam's language about his brother.

Sam pushed the chocolate pie towards Castiel, who looked confused. "What was the purpose of this, Sam?" Castiel sounded really confused and Sam almost felt bad for laughing at him. Obviously, the other man had no idea why he was laughing like an idiot, but he really couldn't help himself. He rested his chin on his hand, "If you're going to insist on icourting/i Dean, I say you need to know your pie. Now eat up, I'll eat the cherry and box the apple for you to give to Dean."

Castiel nodded seriously, before picking up a fork and trying a piece of the chocolate pie. A couple of chews later, Castiel made a sound of utmost satisfaction, his eyes closing half-way, and Sam could've sworn he just _moaned_. He laughed, throwing his head back before shaking his head.

"Man, you and Dean and pie. Oh god, that's an image I don't ever want in my head again."

---

Dean couldn't believe it.

He was standing across the street from the diner, looking in. His brother and _his_ angel, well, former angel, was sitting in one of the booths, eating ipie/i. What the hell was going on? Why exclude him like that? They know how much he _loves _pie. He didn't understand it. Plus, how dare did Sam bring Castiel out for pie? He was supposed to be the one introducing Castiel into it. He just hasn't gotten to it yet. Dean grinded his teeth together, his eyes narrowing as he watched Castiel break into another smile as Sam let out another laugh.

He shook his head, kicked the asphalt and made his way back to the salvage yard. Surely there was an unsuspecting piece of scrap metal that would appreciate the company of his crowbar.

---

When they got back, Sam gave the Castiel the box that contained the apple pie and told him to give it to Dean. Castiel walked out into the salvage yard and tried to remember what Sam had said. Apparently the plan was "fool proof" because Dean loves his pie. Castiel had witnessed this. Actually, he had witness Dean's love for a lot of things: his brother, food, sex and women. He stayed at the entrance of the yard, quite unsure of what to do next. The thoughts weren't helping, especially his love for women part. Castiel was an angel, and therefore was genderless. Jimmy Novak, bless his soul, just happened to be an eligible vessel of the male biological make up. But now that he's human, it doesn't matter anymore. He was a man, and Dean liked _women_. He voiced this worry to Sam before he was given the pie. Sam gave him a look before shrugging, pushing him out the door, "You're the one with the pie. Trust me, Cas."

Castiel ran a frustrated hand through his hair and sighed, shifting his weight before walking towards the direction where Dean was working. As he got closer, he heard a loud cranking noise of metal meeting metal. It was as if something was falling against one of the scrap cars again and again. When it got faster and faster, Castiel sped up and turned to wear Dean was supposed to be. What he saw made him gasp.

Dean had a crowbar in his hand, and he was beating his latest project back to the scrap that it was. No one knew why he was working on the car in the first place, but he was dedicating much of his time on it. Just yesterday, Dean was really happy and proud of the progress he has made, and now… he doing this. He took a conscious step forward, "Dean, are you alright?"

Castiel blinked as Dean abruptly turned his head and glared at him. He was taken aback by the look on his face. Dean looked like someone just told him something devastating, and before Castiel could address it, Dean went back to beating the car and then with one last swing, he broke the windshield and dumped the crowbar on the ground. He was breathing heavily and he turned towards Castiel.

"Hey Cas, do you love your car now?"

Again, Castiel blinked.

His car?

Dean watched him, before pinching the bridge of his nose. Castiel tilted his head in confusion. Dean must've seen it because he chuckled darkly, "Yes, you heard me. This was for you because fuck, you need to learn how to drive…and that…" he pointed at the scrap car next to it, "Was supposed to be Sammy's." It was in the exact same state as "his" car. It even had its windshield shattered as well.

"Well fuck that."

Then Dean turned his back from Castiel and walked behind the scrapped cars, working on something at the back. He sounded like he was salvaging the parts he had installed.

Castiel didn't understand why Dean was so mad, but the look on his face made him not want to ask. It warmed his heart that Dean had devoted a lot of his time on what was supposed to be his car. But now, it felt like someone took that warmth so abruptly that he could physically feel his chest hurting. Then there was the coldness in Dean's voice. He almost could not fathom how it made him feel. It was worse than doubt or the feeling of betrayal.

He shifted his feet and sighed. There was no use trying to talk to Dean when he obviously was too angry to be rational enough and listen to him. He walked over to the table where Dean's tools were and set the box on it.

"I brought you home some pie Dean. I hope you like it," he called out weakly, before walking back into the house, feeling completely dejected.

---

Sam put down his book when Castiel entered Bobby's library, with Tchaikovsky playing from his laptop. He was taking a break from finally organizing Bobby's book collection and classical music was something he learned to love in his two years at Stanford. It was nice to come back to it now. He smiled at Castiel, only to have it melt off his face when Castiel didn't smile back. Actually, he looked downright distraught about something.

"What did Dean do?" He knew he was assuming, but by the way Castiel just sighed and sat down, he knew he was right. Castiel shrugged, before leaning back on his chair. It was a very human gesture that Sam still has to get used to seeing coming from him.

"He's unhappy about something. He yelled at me and then refused to talk." Sam looked at him sympathetically. Castiel looked like a kicked puppy. It was the only way you could describe the look on his face. He wasn't looking at Sam, but at the table, his eyes wide and confused. It was as if he couldn't figure out why Dean acted the way he did.

"You should just tell him how you feel. Seriously Cas, Dean's not one for the roses, or anything like that. He's not the kind to court. You don't ask him out to go dancing or anything!" Suddenly, Castiel looked up, "How am I to do that when he—dancing?"

Sam sighed, rubbing his face. He just had to open his big mouth. Before he could rectify that dancing is a big no, Castiel parted his lips and said the words, "Can you teach me?"

Castiel was looking at him with earnest blue eyes that just pierced right through him. Sam sighed, "Cas, just…just go to Dean and say what you feel. Just trust me on this." But Castiel looked like he didn't want to budge at all and repeated his question again. Just when he was about to say no, the track changed "The Waltz of the Flowers" from the Nutcracker on his laptop. Great, even the universe was against him. He threw his arms up in the air and flailed. "Fine."

Castiel stood with him, not knowing what to do or say, but Sam could tell he was curious. He grinned, chuckling softly. It had been a long time since he has seen a grown man with such curiosity over anything. It was a refreshing sight to see, especially after all they've been through. But still, he never thought he'd do this with anyone, and especially Castiel. Hopefully, this ends way better than how his last slow dancing experience.

Sam wordlessly extended his hand over to Castiel, and the man took it with ease. Then he made sure that Castiel's hand was the one on top. When Castiel looked confused and tilted his head, Sam couldn't help but laugh. He had no idea that he was being set up to be the female counterpart of the whole thing. Sam maneuvered Castiel's other hand on his shoulder and placed his own free hand on Castiel's hip, pulling him closer. The whole time, he was trying to stop from giggling. Castiel just looked up at him.

"Is laughter a part of this exercise, Sam?" He said it with such a straight face that Sam couldn't help himself and he just let everything out. He laughed, and he laughed and he laughed, his hands gripping Castiel's shoulder as he held himself up. He didn't notice Castiel's lips quirking in a small smile as he continued to just look at Sam. And neither of them saw Dean just outside the door for about half a minute before disappearing again.

When he was done and he straightened himself up, he grinned and straightened his back. Sure, this situation was definitely awkward and he would never hear the end of it, but he's helping Castel, and therefore, helping Dean as well.

"Alright, let's get this done."

---

When Dean finally entered the house, he could hear classical music coming from the library. He rolled his eyes, knowing that it was Sam. He wanted to avoid his brother and Castiel for as long as he could, but the bathroom was down the same hallway. He shook his head and walked passed the half closed door, with every intention to ignore anyone inside. Then something caught his eye.

His brother was holding onto Castiel and laughing, looking incredibly happy about something. He was holding Castiel close, one hand on his hip, the other on his shoulder. Dean could see Castiel smiling at the sight and Dean felt his heartbreak. He shook his head, and turned back to the salvage yard, forgetting why he was in the house in the first place.

---

It turned out Castiel has two left feet.

Even a man of Sam's size can only take a certain amount of steps on his feet before he's had enough. After the thirteenth time, he called for a break.

"Alright, we're not getting anywhere. You have no rhythm." Castiel looked frustrated, refusing to sit down. Sam felt bad for him, but his feet were really sore now. He sighed, "Cas, go. Just go out there and tell Dean that you like him. You don't have to court him, you don't have to do anything except tell him."

Castiel stared at him, before looking at the floor. "He was incredibly upset this morning that he destroyed the cars he was working on Sam. I doubt he wants to talk to me." Sam frowned but shook his head, "Whatever. Just, get to it. Just tell him, 'Dean, I like you' or something like that. Then ask him out to pie."

Sam stood up and pushed Castiel out the door, much like he did that morning. Before Castiel can say anything, he shook his head, "Go. Do it. No courting, not anything. Get it out."

Castiel stood there, looking annoyed after Sam had manhandled him out of the library. Then he turned his back and walked towards the salvage yard, for the second time that day.

---

Dean saw Castiel approaching and growled, glaring at the man as he stopped two-feet away from him. His chest twinge, hurt. He missed the days when Castiel was all up into his space, instead of his brother. He sighed and looked at the bottle in his hand, "What do you want, Cas?"

Castiel blinked, looking like he was taken aback by Dean's choice of words. Then, he looked down and parted his lips before closing them again. He's probably there to ask for his blessing. Dean shook his head and threw his hands up, "You know what, forget it. Whatever you have to say, just don't, alright? I know OK? I fucking know. Way to complicate things Cas, but I hope you're happy. But I can't Cas. I can't give you what you want…I just _can't_."

He was breathing heavy after the rant, and felt his heart broke when Castiel's eyes widened impossibly at his words, his eyes growing glossier and glossier at every syllable even as his face remained stoic. When Dean was done, Castiel stood there, before he bowed his head and looked down at his hands. Dean followed his gaze and saw that Castiel's hands were shaking furiously. He closed his eyes tight and shook his head. He wasn't going to give in. He can't give his blessing to Castiel and Sam. The very action would _kill_ him.

When he opened his eyes, Castiel was still looking down, but he was backing away from Dean, one step after another. Then when he was about five feet away, too far for Dean to reach out to, and oh god he wanted to so badly, Castiel's parted his lips and breathed out the words "I'm sorry," before turning on his heels and walking back towards the house.

---

Sam was in the kitchen when Castiel entered the house again as if a demon was chasing him. He frowned and went to him, catching him by the arm. The shorter man looked up at him and Sam's eyes widened when he saw how upset Castiel was, just by looking at his eyes.

"Castiel, what happened?" He kept his voice low and gentle, wanting Castiel to trust him still. Obviously, pressuring Castiel to just go to Dean didn't work out like he thought it would. Castiel sighed, looking down on the floor. "I misunderstood, Sam. Your brother holds no feelings for me."

Now that can't be right. Sam led Castiel to the couch and sat him down, before sitting beside him. "Did he actually say that Cas? I mean, I was sure he had at least _something_, or I wouldn't have encouraged you" he started, but when Castiel shook his head, and stood up and away from him, he stopped and watched him. Castiel was shaking, backing away from him and towards the front door. He looked at Sam in the eyes, "He said he couldn't give me what I wanted Sam. I was fool to think that he felt what I feel for him."

Before could Sam say anything else, Castiel turned and exited the house again, grabbing his jacket as he did so. Sam let out an annoyed breath and ran a hand down his face. "Goddamnit, Dean."

---

Dean hadn't moved since Castiel had left and when he saw his little brother walking towards him, he shook his head and threw the bottle of whiskey down on the floor, and staggered over him, "What do you want Sam? What else could you fucking possibly want?"

Sam stopped him from falling over, catching him roughly by the shoulders. Dean felt himself falling back against the hood he was just sitting on and looked up at his brother, who looked absolutely annoyed.

"Dean, why did you reject Castiel like that?" Sam's voice so soft, so fucking condescending, that Dean had to laugh. He laughed, throwing his head back, making Sam look at him as if he was insane. When he was done, he glared at his brother and shook his head.

"Sammy, you don't get it. Just…go, be happy with Cas. But I won't give you my blessing, I can't. I just can't…" he trailed off, shaking his head again, backing away from Sam, who was looking at him as if he grew another head. Then, a look of realization flashed across Sam's eyes.

"Oh you fucking idiot!" he yelled, flailing his huge arms. Dean looked at him, frowning. "Excuse me?"

Sam laughed, big and huge, his chest heaving with utmost mirth. He gathered Dean into his arms and clapped him hard on the shoulder, "Castiel isn't asking your blessing you idiot for us! He likes you! Not me!"

Dean blinked, his forehead creased in a frown, "But you guys were eating pie together…and you were holding him and…what the hell?" Sam blushed and shook his head, "How the hell did you know…ah whatever. Stalker. He wanted to court you. He said he wanted to do it right. He didn't want to be one of your one-night stands. He asked for my help."

Then he gripped his brother's shoulders tightly and looked at him seriously, "Now, what the hell did you say to him? He looked like he just had his heart ripped out of his chest and got stomped on." By the way Dean paled, Sam knew that Dean had screwed things up royally. "Forget it, whatever you said, just fix it, jerk."

Dean glared and slapped Sam's hand away, "Bitch," he muttered, walking towards the house. "Where is he?"

Sam shrugged, "He left. Probably for a walk to clear his head. Give him time Dean. And you need to sober up to." Dean frowned but agreed, plopping back down on the hood, with Sam right beside him.

---

An hour later, Castiel still wasn't back. So Dean went looking for him. By the time Dean found him, he felt like an enormous _dick_.

Castiel was sitting at a booth in the diner, with a plate of chocolate pie for himself, and a plate of apple pie placed across from him. He was picking at his, staring blankly at nothing. He looked utterly pathetic and he didn't even notice Dean standing right outside the diner.

So when Dean entered the diner and sat across from him, Castiel honest to god jumped. His eyes widened considerably and stiffened, "Dean…"

Dean gave him a tentative smile, before picking up the fork beside the apple pie. He reached over and grabbed Castiel's hand, massaging the skin as Castiel flinched before trying a piece of the pie. He chewed it and smiled softly, then went to try a piece of Castiel's.

Castiel looked confused and looked like he didn't know what to do with himself. His hand was still stiff under Dean's. Finally, Dean gave in and flashed him an apologetic smile, squeezing his hand affectionately, "I was a huge dick. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, and I'm sorry."

Castiel stared at him, before nodding. He squeezed Dean's hand back, parting his lips to say what he wanted to say for a while. To his horror, none of the words came out. Dean had apologized and he shouldn't feel bad anymore. But he couldn't get rid of the residual hurt that came from Dean's words from before. He looked down, his face colouring red. He couldn't find the words.

Dean watched him for a while, then tugged at his hand until Castiel looked up. He flashed him another smile and stood up, before shoving himself beside Castiel on his side of the booth. Dean turned and took a hold of his hand again, "I wasn't going to lean over the table like some kind of chick." Castiel tilted his head in confusion, and then almost gasped loudly when Dean pressed a soft kiss on his lips. Before he could kiss back, Dean leaned away and grinned at him.

"Now tell me. If you wanted to get with me, why the hell were you slow dancing with my brother?"


End file.
